my grandpa died last saturday. he was 84 yrs old. he lived a rough life. he was in jail for about 20yrs in cuba for being against castro. i was at a wedding when he passed. my mom wanted me to go out and just live. it was the saddest wedding i had ever been to.
so this week has been blah. i'm ovulating so i'm having these crazy mood swings! i feel like crying one minute and the next i want to kick someone's ass!! plus i havent texted nor emailed the ex in about a month. i'm very proud but also sad cause i cant believe he hasnt checked to see if i'm doing ok. i guess since i complained that i didnt want him as a friend if he was just pitting me cause i was sick he must have been like well fuck her. i just want to find the one already. god why cant i find him? i've tried everything. i feel like such a loser always fucking talking about this. i'm really not like this at all, i just love venting when i write and i always vent about my health and my lack of relationships. couples make me barf! yesterday my friend told me he was going to propose to his gf and he was looking at rings. i actually started to look at rings as well just to get an idea. lol. i'm such a dork. i found a dress and an antique looking ring. haha. i dont even have a man and i'm doing all this crap. geez!!