Last night when i went to bed i prayed. i really never pray. i feel like if i pray and things go wrong i'll get mad at god. yesterday i just felt so lost and i felt so sad that i didnt do as well as i wanted to in my pft's so i just prayed to god to help me and to not let me quit. i woke up today with such a great energy. i worked out i danced i sang i jumped like a kid. i dont have weights so i took out the gallon of water in my fridge and did weights with it. then returned some calls and did other stuff. i went online and found out some dude i was hooking up with after my ex, he was the rebound, got a girlfriend. i was happy about that too cause i dont have to worry about him either!! woohoo. i feel free.
i do have a problem. even though i'm doing great i do feel like a failure in one aspect. i never finished college. i was able to go in my twenties. i was in great health but i needed to work full time to get insurance. my mom's job wouldnt cover me. i traded in school for work. now it's weird telling people i have no education but i have my life. they dont understand it. they think oh this girl is so lazy she lives with her parents has no bills, etc. which is so false i pay my car, my credit cards, my phone, my gas, my extra stuff lol. i guess i could do online classes but i need money and i'm tired of asking my parents. i did apply at my old job working in a per-diem aspect. hopefully they'll call me soon.